Sidney Celesta Short

Fri 01 Jan 2016 09∶12∶30

TV AUDIO - And everyone here in Town Square is eagerly awaiting the final countdown to 2016. The crowd has been gathered around the area for 12 hours. (fades)

Sidney - Celesta….

(Celesta staring to the side; bored)

Sidney - Celesta!

(Celesta looks at Sidney)

Sidney - It’s your turn.

Celesta - I’m..not..moving….(teeth grit)

Sidney - Then you forfeit the game.

Celesta - Why am I even playing this stupid shit with you?

Sidney - Because I’m an idiot that doesn’t know any better so you spend every Thursday evening with me so I can feel loved?

Celesta - Ughhh…

Sidney - Come on, you usually like board games.

Celesta - You mean how you like playing Crazy 8’s with fucking Yu-Gi-Oh cards??

Sidney - You’re just jealous of my Charizard. (Blue Eyes White Dragon)

Celesta stares; agitated.

Sidney - Aww..I never noticed how similar our eyes are.

Celesta - Sidney!


Celesta - Ughh…another worthless year gone…Another worthless year to come…

Sidney - Hey! Alright! HAPPY EASTER!!!

Celesta - I swear to fucking god Sidney, if you weren’t already dead I’d pull your throat out through your fucking ass.

Sidney appears with bunny ears and a weird nose.

Sidney - That’s no way to celebrate Easter…

Celesta’s teeth grit.

Sidney - Aren’t you gonna help me hide the eggs?

Celesta - I’m going to fucking destroy you!

Sidney - Celestaaa, why do you always gotta be such a stuck up ——-

Celesta - *scoffs*

Sidney - Come on, we can play your favorite game. What was that called again?

Celesta - Hide and go fuck yourself..

Sidney - Okay, you hide, I’ll -

Sidney - You wanna screw me?..I..I..I..Okay, I think I have some nails lying around here somewhere…

Celesta - uuuUUUUururghhhH!!!

Andrew and Froggy stare through the window

Froggy - *girly giggle* Oooh they’re fighting again!

Andrew - Ohh boy…

Celesta - Sidney, to put it in terms your thick skull can understand, I’m going to go shoot some dopey wopey, get as high as a fucking kite, and hopefully pass out and never fucking wake up.

Sidney - Roger that, Cornel Sanders!

Celesta disappears in a spell. Andrew and Froggy teleport in with their own spell.

Andrew - Aww, we missed it..

Froggy - Bummer…

Sidney - Hey guys, Happy Easter!

Andrew - Sidney..I know you’re not the brightest ghost out there but if you picked up a book once in a while you’d really learn a lot.

Sidney - Nah, that’s alright. Sometimes I just act extra stupid to see how far I can push her temper.

Andrew - Anyways, we’re having a jam session, wanna come with?

Sidney - You ever known me to turn down a little strummy chuggy? I’m so there!